Time,Communication etc. -09.09.2011

1 09.09.2011 Fwd: Promise Myself Tuesday, October 4, 2011 7:47 PM

"ramanujam kishore"

2 1.11.2011 Fwd: Fw: [viswanathan] Fw: Fwd: Fw: 5 minute mgt. course [1 Attachment]

Sunday, October 30, 2011 5:29 AM
From: "C R Sankaran" crsankaran1938@gmail.com*
1 09.09.2011

Fwd: Promise Myself

Tuesday, October 4, 2011 7:47 PM

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------11.2011 2 1.11.2011                  Fwd: Fw: [viswanathan] Fw: Fwd: Fw: 5 minute mgt. course [1 Attachment]
Sunday, October 30, 2011 5:29 AM
From: "C R Sankaran" crsankaran1938@gmail.com*
Lesson 1:**


*A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her

shower, when the doorbell rings.*

*The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.*

*When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbour.*

*Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 to drop that towel.'*

*After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in

front of Bob, after a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.*

*The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.*

*When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, 'Who was that?'*

*'It was Bob the next door neighbour,' she replies.*

*'Great,' the husband says, 'did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?'


*Moral of the story:*

*If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your

shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable


*Lesson 2:*

*A priest offered a Nun a lift.*

*She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg.*

*The priest nearly had an accident.*

*After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.*

*The nun said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'*

*The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up

her leg again. The nun once again said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'*

*The priest apologized 'Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.'*

*Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.*

*On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It

said, 'Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.'*

*Moral of the story:*

*If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great


*Lesson 3:**


*A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch

when they find an antique oil lamp.*

*They rub it and a Genie comes out.*

*The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.'*

*'Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk. 'I want to be in the Bahamas,

driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.'*

*Puff! She's gone.*

*'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing

on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas

and the love of my life.'*

*Puff! He's gone.*

*'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager.*

*The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch.'*

*Moral of the story:*

*Always let your boss have the first say.*

*Lesson 4**


*An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.*

*A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you and do


*The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.'*

*So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a

sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.*

*Moral of the story:To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting

very, very high up.*

*Lesson 5**


*A turkey was chatting with a bull.*

*'I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree' sighed the turkey,

'but I haven't got the energy.'*

*'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the bull.

They're packed with nutrients.'*

*The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough

strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.*

*The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.*

*Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of

the tree.*

*He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.*

*Moral of the story:Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep

you there..*

*Lesson 6*

*A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird

froze and fell to the ground into a large field.*

*While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.*

*As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize

how warm he was.*

*The dung was actually thawing him out!*

*He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.A passing

cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.*

*Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow

dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.*

*Morals of the story:*

*(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.*

*(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your*

* friend.*

*(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep*

* your mouth shut!*


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